Dr. Sharon Cohen | Seven Steps For Singles To Savor The Holidays This Year
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Seven Steps For Singles To Savor The Holidays This Year

Seven Steps For Singles To Savor The Holidays This Year

Do you ever enter into the holiday season with a teeny, tiny bit of trepidation?

I mean, you’re excited and all. You love seeing friends and family. You enjoy the parties. Well, most of them.

And there’s a little voice inside of you that’s whispering, “oh no! I’m not ready for all the craziness that’s ahead!”

Well, it’s time to embrace the holiday season this year because it’s all about you, baby!

A Guide To Make This The Best Holiday Season Ever

Here’s a guide for YOU to make this your very best holiday season ever.

  1. Do what feels good.

Don’t force yourself to do anything that doesn’t feel good. And don’t do too much. There’s lots of pressure to do it all. Don’t buy into it. Let your body and your feelings lead you. If an event is coming up and all you feel is dread about it, skip it. Listen to your inner guide.

  1. Make your environment beautiful and inviting.

I love this time of year when we put up the string of lights inside the house, draped over the mantle. We also seem to light candles more often. And, sister, candlelight looks good on everyone! So, get your candlelight on whether you’re at home alone or if you have company. It feels romantic. It looks romantic. Use it to your advantage to get in the mood. Perhaps you’ll be inspired…

  1. Try something new this year.

    Try cooking up a beautiful new dessert this year

You could cook up a new dish or bake a beautiful unique dessert. Make it something bright and colorful. Or you could add to or switch up a faithful old tradition. Spice things up a little.

Doing so can really give you a boost when things get boring and predictable. We love our routines, but we also need the excitement of being alive. Especially if you are, say, the Explorer personality type, you need variety.

Doing something different during a particularly tradition-oriented season adds a touch of newness to something that’s tried and true. Everyone’s needs can get met. I call that a happy holiday season.

  1. Be present.

Wherever you are, be there. Stop focusing on where you need to be next, what all you need to get done, what’s happening with your phone, snapping pictures for IG, writing captions and hashtags. Actually BE with the people who are in front of you at this very moment. Look into their eyes when they’re speaking with you and make a connection. Your presence will be the best gift you can give yourself and them.

And you never know who you’ve had in your life who you haven’t really been paying attention to. Maybe your true love has been right in front of you but you’ve been too busy posting and swiping to notice.

  1. Do something that really scares you.

Research has shown that when we do something that piques our adrenaline, we feel connected to the person who we are doing it with. The Bachelor/Bachelorette series has been very strategic in why they have dates include bungee jumping, rappelling down buildings, and going on helicopter rides. All of these can be terrifying, adrenaline-inducing activities that increase the levels of attraction between the couples.

Feelings of excitement, heightened anxiety, and even fear can invoke feelings of sexual arousal and attraction. Organizing these sorts of activities for yourself and a partner or date can spice up your holiday season.

  1. Do something for someone else.

    Volunteer Up Close And Personal This Year

Make your volunteer activity be an up close and personal act this year.

Find an elderly person or couple who live near you and see if they want to spend a couple of hours together having a hot drink and dessert or if they need any help with anything around the house. The company might be really lovely for them.

Or maybe there’s someone in your neighborhood who recently lost someone they loved. You’d be surprised how often people who are close to them want to give them space so they can “get over” their loss when what they really need is support and people who will “hold space” for them.

What “holding space” means, simply, is to be present with someone as a witness to their emotional state. To validate what they are going through. At the same time, you do not allow your feelings to interfere with theirs. In this way, their feelings can be processed and released while you are creating a sort of container for this unfolding to take place.

So look around and see how you can give back in some way. You’ll be surprised how good this will make you feel.

  1. Receive openly.

So many women are “doers” and “givers” that we don’t know how to properly receive. When someone offers you a compliment, do you compliment them back right away and cancel out their compliment?

Stop doing that.

Fully receive the compliment.

Do you say “oh, this old thing?” or “I haven’t washed my hair in two days. It has a mind of its own” or in some way denying or discounting their compliment.

This. Must. Stop.

Learn to receive. Accept help out to your car from the bagger at the grocery store, even if you are fully capable of carrying your bags out yourself. It’s a practice to receive.

Really appreciate the latte art on your coffee in the morning. Notice and appreciate when someone does something for you. Receive it and thank them. People do things for you all the time, but do you stop and receive the energy of what they are giving you or doing for you?

When you do, when you stop pushing away the support that people offer you, you will receive even MORE and it will feel good. The universe will shower you with even more support. You won’t feel so depleted and overworked. You will feel buoyed by the energy you are being given.

If someone gives you a gift and you didn’t get them a gift, receive it with great joy. Do not rush out to get them a gift. Be appreciative, grateful and loving. That’s the energy with which the gift was given. Receive in the same light.

Put It Into Action To Make This The Best Holiday Season Ever

Putting these seven action steps into place will make this a new, exciting, and pleasurable holiday season for you.

Let your inner voice be your guide through it all. Surround yourself with beauty. Try something new. Be here now. Do exciting new things. Make your volunteering up close and personal this year. And learn how to receive. When you’ve got these in place, rather than being exhausted after the first of January, you’ll be smiling and ready for the new year.

Enjoy your holidays!

And, of course, I’m always here for you if you feel you want more support during the holiday season and beyond. Call me at 949-682-9304 for a complimentary 15-minute Love Breakthrough phone consultation.

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